When life gets hard and seems that the whole universe is conspiring to pin us down, it is by loving others that makes us feel alive. Loving can hurt sometimes and people’s perception of its real meaning depends mostly on experience and their personality. Simply put, what is a good food to one man can be a poison to others.
When I was in college, I couldn’t stand the pathetic spectacle of a woman banging her head against an impregnable wall. I hate seeing myself falling so damn hard into a man and he couldn’t care less. I’ve had my share of ups and downs, I wouldn’t say that I am totally invulnerable with petty mistakes but I could say that I am smarter now, more cautious, and quite in control.
I was able to maintain a safe flirtation with a man from another side of the world online. This kept us both insulated from real entanglements. It is his idea of a relationship where we enjoy what we have in the present, no feelings are hurt, and no emotions are at stake. And he is definitely, fooling himself or sad to say, taking advantage of my vulnerability. And heck, I am allowing it. Sometimes I could be so stupid and stubborn. But who cares? I am happy. The attention he gives me, no matter how brief, no matter hollow, makes me smile and helps me face the day with the hope that the best is yet to come. Admit it, we all need something or someone to keep us from falling apart. And having his presence is what’s holding me up these days. Does this means, I cannot survive if he decides to let go of me? To be honest, it would be one of the greatest blow in my life if that happens. It would surely break my heart into tiny pieces. Still, I believe that I can get through it. Thank God.
These days, I no longer make a fuss or sensationalize things. I see things in a different light, I look at difficulties and heartaches in a positive point of view. It doesn’t make me feel totally good but it is helping. My two cents? Allow me to share it… maybe in God’s perfect time, this man will realize my worth or maybe God will remove him out of my life to make a way for another person who will truly love me. I don’t know what the future holds but I’m sure that God is seeing what I’m going through.
What are your thoughts about the quote above? It pans out, right? But am afraid most people won’t realize it until it’s too late. Until the person was gone. I could only hope that it will not be too late for him. That’s it for our ‘Weekly Quotes To Ponder’ moment. Enjoy reading!
erhynireh 